Home Illuminati Roundtable Illuminati Roundtable: Somebody Please Remove Ray-J Out The Paint

Illuminati Roundtable: Somebody Please Remove Ray-J Out The Paint

by Pooh Bailey

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(Photo Courtesy Of Google Images)

I hit! I hit! I hit! I hit! I hit it number 372nd! Well that’s not the words but it might as well be. So Ray-J (wait aint that Brandy’s brother) decided to take a break from playing piano in Floyd Mayweather’s living room, to drop a new song. The song is called “I Hit It First” and it’s paying homage to his sextape co-star, Kim Kardashian. Recently, Mr. 7 Rolls-Royces, stated that the song wasn’t about Mrs. Humphries. However, the single artwork is a pixel picture of Kim. Some of the lyrics to this great song are: “She might move on to rappers and ballplayers. But we all know I hit it first. / I had her head going North and her ass going South. But now baby chose to go West. / No matter where she goes or who she knows. She still belongs in my bed.”

Oh Ray-J. If you were a key on a computer, you would be a space-bar, the way you stay pressed. It’s been over six years and you’re still bringing up Kim. Yes, you made her famous. And that’s it. Since that horrible excuse of a sextape, Kim has built a multi-million dollar empire. You, however, are stranded on VH1 and are on call to fetch Mayweather’s feather boa. Contrary to belief, you weren’t the first to ‘hit it’. According to Kim, she has been a pillow princess since the age of 14. Hell she was married and divorced before meeting you. I know. I know. When you think nobody cares about you (honestly we don’t), you like to pull the Kim card. In 2013 though, half of the NFL and the cast of Les Miserables can pull that card. So I suggest you just continue to get those VH1/Oxygen checks and leave the singing to your sister in bathrooms. -Pooh Bailey

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