Illuminati Roundtable: Kanye West, The Perfect Politician
My fellow Americans, ask not what your Yeezus can do for you, ask what you can do for Yeezus. During this year’s stale and forgettable VMAs, Kanye Omari West announced that he would run for president in 2020. While the world gave a collective sigh and ‘Oh Kanye,’ I thought about it. Kanye West as President. President West. First Lady Kim Kardashian. Wait. But lets think about it. If you swap any current politician running for President with Ye nothing changes but the color of the skin.
The main thing most politicians have in common is the fact that they contradict themselves. Kanye West, during the VMAs, accepted the Vanguard Award with a rant about award shows. Basically he doesn’t understand them and artists shouldn’t be judged. But here’s the funny part. In this same speech, he complains about artists who should have really won the big awards. So which is it? Artists shouldn’t be put on the chopping block for their art or the right artists should get the awards they deserve? If Kanye really was opposed to the idea of award shows, he would stop showing up. His friends have. That’s like going to McDonald’s and complaining about how you hate the McRib. If that’s truly the case, go somewhere else. But that’s not in Yeezy’s nature. Just like Donald Trump, Kanye is all about putting on a show and convincing the world of his faux pas leadership.
Kanye West’s Presidency would be less Bun-B and more George W. Bush. Helping out his rich colleagues while ignoring the poor minorities, you know Bush-like. Even now Yeezy doesn’t even believe racism exists, just classism. All of this because fashion houses told him to start from the bottom. Girl I guess. It’s obvious he doesn’t understand how racism and classism go hand in hand. Nor does he understand the idea of working from the bottom up. But that doesn’t matter to the faux-intellects who will eat everything he says up. All I know is that if Kanye Omari is truly considering running, he has the qualifications of the perfect Republican. I just hope he tones up that Kate Gosselin voice he’s been using. –Pooh Bailey